the bread of singleness ...

when i got in the car sunday night, a lady was saying that if we trust God to provide everything we need, then we have to trust that what we don't have (specifically a husband) is not something we need right now.  it struck me that God is saying there is something we need more at this time ~ the benefits of singleness, the preparation, his preparation ~ whatever the case may be.  while this is something that i fundamentally know, it was put in a way i had not considered before.  it was a powerful reminder and encouragement when my singleness can be such a struggle. 

God withholds no good thing from His children.  this is not me asking for bread and Him giving me a stone (matthew 7: 10 & 11).  no, He is a good Father who gives only good gifts to His children.  i have to trust that this is, in fact, the best bread i have ever tasted, and enjoy every bite until such time as He sees fit to give me a new recipe.

the israelites had to eat manna for a VERY long time, but let us not forget that it was still bread from HEAVEN!  if we fall into the trap of complaining about what we have and wanting more, then we run the risk of God giving us what we THINK we need ... and the risk of being struck down by the very thing we craved.

“Tell the people: ‘Consecrate yourselves in preparation for tomorrow, when you will eat meat. The Lord heard you when you wailed, “If only we had meat to eat! We were better off in Egypt!” Now the Lord will give you meat, and you will eat it.  You will not eat it for just one day, or two days, or five, ten or twenty days,  but for a whole month—until it comes out of your nostrils and you loathe it—because you have rejected the Lord, who is among you, and have wailed before him, saying, “Why did we ever leave Egypt?”’”

Now a wind went out from the Lord and drove quail in from the sea.  It scattered them up to two cubits deep all around the camp, as far as a day's walk in any direction.  All that day and night and all the next day the people went out and gathered quail.  No one gathered less than ten homers.  Then they spread them out all around the camp.  But while meat was still between their teeth, and before it could be consumed, the anger of the Lord burned against the people, and He struck them with a severe plague.  Therefore the place was named Kibroth Hattaavah, because there they buried the people who had craved other food.  (numbers 11: 18 - 20, 31 - 34).

in the words of chris daughtry ...
Be careful what you wish for
'Cause you just might get it all
And then some you don't want

i am so thankful that God knows His children intimately - what they are struggling with, how to speak to them in a way that they will hear, and exactly what they need even when they don't understand.  may we not be found craving anything other than what He gives.

taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the one who takes refuge in Him.  (psalm 34:8)

splinters ...

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A post I've been building on for a while now, and it actually goes with my last one quite well ~

I don’t often get splinters, but in the past couple of months, I’ve had three, and they got me thinking …

I had one pesky little splinter in my middle finger for several weeks.  It started out when I noticed that the tip of the finger was a little sore, but couldn’t tell why.  Then, as I pressed down on it, I realized that a miniscule splinter had somehow embedded itself deep beneath the skin.  I mentioned trying to dig it out to a friend, but that never happened.  It didn’t hurt that bad, and it wasn’t irritated so I just let it be.  As the weeks went on, the splinter gradually worked its way to the surface.  It got to where I could see it without having to press down, and then I could feel it when running another finger across the surface, and then a tiny blister formed as the splinter worked to push its way out from beneath that last layer of skin.  Finally, it popped all the way through and was gone without me even realizing.

Next, I got one on the palm of my right hand, just below my pointer finger.  It was actually just an inch below one I got a long time ago that I never removed and has been incorporated into my skin, and it seems the new one is destined to go the way of the first.  It started out at the surface, but did not bother me at all.  I would not have even known it was there had it not been visible.  I picked at it a little and it could have easily been removed with some help, but was in a difficult spot to get by myself.  Honestly, I forget about it unless I happen to see it.  Now it is being absorbed into my skin like the first, fading, dissipating, but still very much there.  It would take a lot of work to get it out at this point.  Even more so for the first.  Would it even be worth it?

Then I got one on the middle knuckle of my middle finger on my right hand.  Again, it didn’t hurt or even bother me, but it was much more prominent.  I picked at it much more than the previous ones, and without much time or effort, it popped right out.  The little hole it left in my skin will heal quickly, leaving only the memory.

Of course, we can’t forget the other kind.  The big honkin’ ones that digs themselves deep within your skin and refuse to be ignored for any significant amount of time.  If left alone, they get red and irritated.  Your body knows that it has been infiltrated by a foreign object and fights with all its defenses to get it out.  These must be removed.  It is often a painful process, and the area remains quite sore for a time afterward, but it is necessary for the health of your body.

I love the way God gives us pictures of how He desires to work in our lives, but I think I’ll leave it at that for today and give you some time to ponder as I’ve had time to ponder for myself. 

hammering with the Holy Spirit ...

so, i'm kind of starting to write again.  i've had an interesting week, full of interesting conversations, and the juices can't help but flow.

it's about time.

a friend posted this video on facebook this morning, and it went right along with one of my conversations from yesterday.  i added my comments to his post, but thought they were worth sharing, adding to, and offering up for conversation here.

http://vimeo.com/66753575

i'm not gonna lie.  it made me laugh.  i would argue, however, that a more appropriate ending would have been her taking the nail out later, and then coming back and thanking him for listening.   oftentimes, we know the nails are there. we're not looking for someone else to take them out for us, or to tell us that we need to. we just need to talk about them a bit (okay, fine, analyze them to death; i'll give you that ;) before we get to the point of taking them out ourselves.

his response to that was, "Or. Another alternate ending. One of her friends saying exactly what he said and her saying 'You're exactly right.'"

again, this made me chuckle.   except i respond that way to my friends, too ... well, not too, since i'm not married. maybe it will change once i am. but i think, as a general rule, people don't want to be fixed ~ they just want someone to walk beside them as they figure out how to fix themselves. 

in john 14:26, Jesus says, "but the Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you."

there's such a fine line between speaking truth into someone's life and trying to be their Holy Spirit.  just like i would want them to trust my relationship with the Holy Spirit to point out the nails in my life, i have to trust that for them, as well.  offer input where asked, based on God's truth and what you believe He would have you say to them.  be willing to have, and listen to, frank conversations when necessary.  but, for the most part ...

how can you say to your brother, ‘let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?  (matthew 7:4) 

so, i'll be over here working on my nail, and you can be over there working on yours.  i'll tell you about how i struggle with mine, and you tell me about how you struggle with yours, and we can encourage one another in our nail removal along the way.

thanks for listening :)

a year of trust & more hope for haiti ...

 

It’s crazy to think about all that has happened in the past year.  At this time a year ago, I was beginning preparations to work on a cruise ship for 6 months.  In June, I was fortunate enough to make my third trip to Haiti.  I fall more and more in love with that country, and find it harder to come back here, every time I go.  Then, at the end of July I saw God make dreams come true in miraculous ways, followed by news that shook my faith to the core.  I was forced to cling to His goodness and faithfulness like never before.  I was forced to focus on what is truly important.  And I was forced to change my plans, returning to my job as a Special Education Assistant at the Elementary School instead of working on the cruise ship.  
 

From a financial standpoint, I didn’t think I would be able to stay there, but God has made a way time and again.  I have absolutely loved this school year, and I have also had the opportunity to coach a running/mentoring group for 3^rd – 5^th grade girls, teach an art club for 4^th & 5^th graders, and help lead youth group at church.  Then, in February, instead of coming back from sea, I was buying my own home!  The process was long and trying, but like the Israelites wandering in the desert, it made the promised land that much sweeter.  God provided in huge ways at every turn, and it has been such a blessing to have a place of my own where I can host and bless others.  This year has certainly been one of great challenges and obstacles, as well as triumphs and joys … and I wouldn’t trade a moment as my trust in God has grown both in width and depth.  

Now that another school year is coming to an end, I look toward the summer with great anticipation.  I don’t know all that God has in store, but I do know that I have the opportunity to return to Haiti for the 4^th time with a team of close friends and youth.  The date of our trip is June 22 – 29, and we will be working on building projects, helping with the feeding program, and reaching out to local youth.  I also can’t wait to love on the little girl that I sponsor again, and see how much she has grown!

The cost of my trip, including shots and passport renewal, is $2000 ($700 of which I need by May 1^st) and I am trusting God to provide yet again.  First of all, would you please keep our team, as well as the people in Haiti whom we will be serving, in your thoughts and prayers as we prepare to go?  Secondly, would you consider partnering with us by making a financial contribution?  Donations made out to Restore Haiti (http://restorehaiti.com/) are tax deductible, and checks can be sent to the address below or I have Paypal.  Please let me know if you have any questions.  I would also love to hear how are you doing and if there is any way that I can be praying for you.  As I said, it has been a year of learning to focus on the important things, and that includes you!

With sincere love & gratitude